boring...sort of...XD

haiz...
this few days feel a sort of boring loh..
nth to do always go to school play nothing..for play to play..
dunno wad to do..T.T
study oso no mood do other thing oso dont have the objective..
life like a living corpse and feel that nth for me to stay for in this world..T.T
sometime feel that this is life..
but sometime think that i dont want my life jz like that and flew away from my eyesight..(roar)
i want to do more and try to be the best to conquer to order not being order the stress of jobless come into my life and the pressure that gave by parent of finding job is come always but they never know about it and i never want to tell them abd dont want tell my fren either..XD
bcause this is my life i dont want other ppl worried about me i jz want to carry my burden myself although sometime i will try to seek help from god but sometime jz cannot admit that i always try my best b4 i seek help from GOD..T.T
may be i have a very high confidence on myself and never want to seek help from fren or GOD neither..
but when the problem really came..
and i cant afford i go to find GOD but not seek help from HIM but is go there to blame HIM why became like that.T.T
but GOD will use HIS way to tell me wad i wan and why i will be like that..
although sometime i dont want to admit it but that is true that i am easily to suspicious something that happen aroud me and i have a very good imaginative that no make my life more colourful but make it more terror more horrible than ever...T.T
now my life a bit boring ..no night life not going out find fren "yam cha" so bored until want to kill ppl..XD
play games until boring and really horrible if a person that is nth to do..
wad they need to do only sleeping , eating, and do nothing..
now i can feel that the old ppl feel now..
bcause they will be like that and much more they cant do anything about it but only can accept the faith on it..hahaha